I went downtown with one of my best friends the other day, where we ate lunch, had coffee, went hiking, and ice cream. During our time in the city, we went to the bookstore as well. I bought a few books & I’m in the middle of reading, The Artisan Soul by Erwin Raphael McManus. It’s a brilliant read so far, and I recommend every one of you reading this post to get that book!
It’s about creativity being in our souls since God is THE Creator & because we were made in His image, we are all called to create. The passage that has stuck out to me the most so far tells the story of the author’s dentist and his artistic expression through his profession. This guy plays music on the headset he gives you, and he has his patient put their hands in hot wax and speaks to them in a soothing voice. How this dentist cares so much for the one in the front of him. I read this and suddenly became so inspired to do everything with intention.
I then realized that as much as I’m overall pleased with my job, there is no personal expression, no room for creativity. Going outside the box would very likely get me fired. It hurt to realize that conformity in my workplace is why I’ve been feeling so uninspired artistically. It’s even harder to discover that my workplace has become a security blanket for me.
I want to be like that dentist, and have creativity pouring out from all areas. See, I want to express what the insides of me looks like, and leave some kind of legacy or contribution even. Don’t we all want to be a part of something?
My creativity means so much to me. I’m tired of environments make me afraid of failure. We need room to fail. It’s environments like that that increase my anxiety levels and cover up the creative process by repetitive procedure and systems.
You’ve seen videos and movies where the character is grey in a black and white world- uninspiring. I’m not sure why, but Groundhog Day comes to mind. Phil’s day becomes so repetitive, and I roll my eyes and cringe. “I don’t ever want to have a life like that”, my 9th grade self thinks in Ethics class. My life as a whole is not like that, but certain aspects are revealing themselves to me in this way- repetitive and meaningless, and I feel stuck in my tracks because I don’t know what to do about it.
I was made in the image of God- created to create lovely things nowhere near as lovely as creation itself. It’s discouraging to feel so uninspired, but somehow I will find something that allows freedom of artistic expression, and something I’ll feel so passionate about. In the meantime, I can still be intentional in my current area of expertise or mediocrity. I’ll find that inspiring environment one day, but it might take a while. That is a process that I’m sure I can be patient with.
To my fellow creatives, don’t be discouraged- we are made for this, and we can’t give up yet. We still have stories & light to share with everyone.