Last night, I couldn’t sleep very well, so I decided to pick up a journal I had recently bought (the obsession is real), and try to fill the first few pages. It was such a success! When I was done writing, it was nearly 1:30am. I had made a point to put worship music on, and that influenced my writing & reflection a lot. I haven’t journaled in a long time, so to get everything out on paper made me feel lighter!
Here’s a list of some songs that I had listened to:
- Tremble by Mosaic MSC
- Nothing But The Blood by Citizens & Saints
- Seasons Change by United Pursuit ft. Michael Ketterer
- You Are Worthy by Will Reagan
- High Priest by Rivers & Robots
- Everything To You by Bethel
- The Real Thing by Michael Ketterer
- You Hear Me by Rivers and Robots
- 23 by Red Rocks Worship
- Yahweh by The Brilliance
“These last few days have been unnecessarily hard on my heart. There have been too many attacks on my mind, telling me that I’ll amount to nothing in this life, and that I’ll never get to where I need or want to be. A whole bunch of stuff that does not have a place in my head.
What I totally skipped over in my thinking, was how important it is to speak truths over my life when spiritual attacks like this happen. They can come at any moment, so I have to be on constant watch. It’s important, because it’s very hard to function when all that’s on my mind is how awful I am.
Earlier yesterday, I was reading my devotional & the final pages in my leadership course. They both talked a lot about how we should speak out against the spiritual attacks and remember that we have plenty of promises to lean on from God. It allows for us to become more effective leaders when we learn to do this.
Isn’t it more liberating to know you can take care of someone & their burdens now that you’re not worrying about yourself? Yes!
This takes a lot of discipline. How? Well, we have to be regularly in the Word, reading the promises that God has for us; If we aren’t reminding ourselves of these biblical truths, or seeking them out, how will we know what God thinks?
We also have to pray. A lot. This is something I’m still learning to discipline myself to do. I know my day is unfulfilled if I don’t talk to God during the day. I feel guilty being in bed & talking to Him for only 5 minutes, right before I drift to sleep. Prayer takes a lot of our burdens off of our shoulders, and replaces it with peace. So why do we deprive ourselves of this?
Despite having to relearn discipline in these areas, I’m learning a lot. Learning to go to God with troubles I have is good. It’s important. I’m so glad and thankful for His patience with me. And I’m learning to speak against the things that Satan has planted in my mind. It’s time to put on some gardening gloves and un-root some poisonous roots. The time is so overdue, and I refuse to let it take over my mind any longer.”